Feb. 14, the most dreaded of Hallmark holidays amongst college students, otherwise known as Valentine’s Day, is upon us once again. All the candy canes and marshmallow Santas have been replaced with anxiety in the form of heart shaped chocolate, obese teddy bears, and allergy sparking flowers. January has ended, and you’re beginning to feel a panic wash over you, similar to that of finding a prom date in high school. What will you do without a date, a Valentine, your dignity? Well, it just so happens a new holiday is about to hit Chi-town, courtesy of Pawnee, Indiana’s very own Leslie Knope. It’s a day to kick romance to the curb and celebrate your lady friends (or guy friends). That’s right, DePaul; this Feb. 13, you’re celebrating Galentine’s Day and here’s how to do it right:
The Mantra
“Hoes before bros. Uteruses before duderuses. Ovaries before brovaries.”
Memorize it, chant it together as you dance in your sweatpants to Adele, Beyonce, and Taylor Swift all at the same time. This is a solid opportunity to burn off the waffles you’re about to eat. Today is about the ladies in your life, your BFFs, and kinda your Spotify playlist.
Breakfast Food
Leslie Knope may be a fictional character from the hit series Parks and Recreation, but the role waffles and other breakfast foods play on Galentine’s Day is very real. Get your gal pals together for breakfast, brunch, or breakfast for dinner. Really, whatever time of day works best for you to stuff your face with waffles is fine by us.
Spa Day
Another gem of a philosophy coined from Parks and Rec is taking one day every year to “treat yo self.” Let Feb. 13 be that day! Take your lady loves to one of the salons in Lincoln Park. Get your nails did, a massage, a new do, or fiercen up your eyebrow game. Pamper yourself, make Tom and Donna proud.
Blueberry Moon | 2108 N Halsted St
Massage Envy | 801 W. Diversey Pkwy
Tres Bien Nails | 922 W Armitage
Lincoln Park Massage Spa | 630 W Webster Ave
Nail Fairy and Spa | 1249 W Fullerton Ave
“What’s Galentine’s Day??? Only the best day of the year!!! Every Feb. 13, my lady friends and I leave our husbands and boyfriends at home and just come kick it breakfast style. Ladies celebrating ladies.”
- Leslie Knope, Parks and Recreation
Movie Day
If “treat yo self” doesn’t exactly meet your current budget, don’t fret. Movie it up! Or, if you’ve seen The Titanic and The Notebook so many times they don’t make you sob anymore and you fear you’re turning into the Grinch: Netflix and Galentine’s Day with this Val/Galentine’s Day episode master list:
Parks and Recreation: “Galentine’s Day” S2 | Episode 16
The Office: “Valentine’s Day” S2 | Episode 16
Friends: “The One With the Candy Hearts” S1 | Episode 14
Orange is the new Black: “You Also Have a Pizza” S2 | Episode 6
30 Rock: "St. Valentine's Day" S3 | Episode 11
New Girl: “Valentine’s Day” S1 | Episode 13
Family Guy: "Valentine's Day in Quahog" S11 | Episode 12
Gossip Girl: “Crazy, Cupid, Love" S5| Episode 15
Bob’s Burgers: “My Fuzzy Valentine" S3 | Episode 13
Craft Day
Break out your crafty pants chicas (sweatpants are fine)! Go to Michael’s -the only man you’re allowed to cheat on your gal pals with- and buy the paper, glitter, and markers you need to half-heartedly attempt the DIY Galentine’s you pinned on Pinterest. Give them to each other and cherish them 5evr.
Baking Day
If you’re wondering if waffles are considered “dessert” on Galentine’s Day, you are sorely mistaken. They are a staple of the Galentine’s Day meal plan, however, as Leslie can attest, there’s always room for more sugar. Whether your specialty is baking chocolate chip cookies, Funfetti cupcakes, or you’re thinking you might just sit this one out since your only edible attribution would be dyeing Ramen pink, there’s always dire need for quality inspection.
In the shocking event these suggestions fail to tickle the fancies of you and your homies, it’s no big deal. The important thing is you get to spend the whole day with your best friends, having a blast, without worrying about the pressure of Valentine’s Day to come. Besides, you need time to coordinate who’s driving your posse to Walgreens on Feb. 15 to snag all the discount candy and groan at the over-achieving St. Patrick’s Day and Easter displays.